Why would you be an asshat to the person who is making your food? I am a human being, okay?
It’s not like I MEANT for the Mustard to squeeze out a bit more than you wanted.
If you want “just a little, tiny bit” of mustard, put it the fuck on yourself.
Mustard doesn’t come out slow! Neither…
Recently this is how I’ve felt about you.. You’ve ruined my entire life past and present.. You took everything that meant anything to me and gave it a sour taste . Fuck you
-I hope you own two hoodies, because one of them is definitely mine now and I would be terribly distraught if you froze in the winter.
- Your favorite button up? Also mine now.
- Unless you would like your roommate to see me in just a t-shirt and my panties I suggest your favorite pajama bottoms…